Buying kids' clothes (by Ashley)

Last week we had our first cold day here in Utah. I decided it was probably time to start making my kids wear shoes (my mom would be the first to tell you I don't put them in shoes often enough).

We have been blessed so far in our marriage to never feel the sting of not being able to afford shoes for our babies. Yet there is something so true about being frugal.

With children's clothes, it's incredibly practical. If you know anything about my children you know they are extremely active and hands-on. A full price pair of pants would just be a liability.

It makes financial sense. The less you spend, the more you can save.

And there is something to be said about the experience you give your children. It has been well documented how enriching it is for a person to grow up poor. But what is a person to do if they don't "have to" grow up poor? I believe, to some degree, the experience can be replicated by being frugal. If I don't place an emphasis on needing the new and latest thing, if I am willing to buy second hand for myself and my family, I believe the message that money is a gift and not a privilege will be communicated to them.

We went to a yard sale a few weeks ago in search of a new wardrobe for our baby brother.

It was bright and early on a Saturday morning, so yes, bacon in hand.

In search of another yard sale, we went a little farther south down the freeway (here is Utah, a great resource for local yard sale postings is ksl.com, where you can find out what kinds of things people will be selling by searching the classified postings the night before). On the way back we stopped to see this HUGE truck (Ben is a big fan). So I would call that a win-win for a Saturday.

At this point in our life, we don't buy everything second hand. I'm not a crazy couponer and we eat plenty of meat. You'll see us shopping at regular stores and driving our two cars. But we do spend time thinking about our purchases, what they mean, and the effect they will have on our children. All hoping to create a meaningful life for our children.

Making goals with the Lord's help

This post deals a lot with my love of going to Mormon temples, but the concept of making goals WITH God can be applied to any even semi-religious person who believes in a higher being.
When Adam and I first started dating, we went to the temple.  It was one of our first "dates."  I was so glad that Adam shared my love of going to God's house.

When we got married, we chose to get married in the temple located in Manti, UT.  It was so beautiful and such a special experience for us.

The temple is a very special place for members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints and we are taught that we should attend as often as possible.  From the time that Adam and I started dating to the time that we got married, we had attended the temple every month.  We decided right there that we wanted to continue that.  So we prayed and told the Lord our goal.  We asked for help to be able to achieve it.

We were doing pretty good.  Sometimes money was tight and it looked like we might not be able to go that month.  Sometimes we were so busy that we had to drive the 3  1/2 hours to our nearest temple in DC late on a Friday night - going there and back in the darkness.  But somehow, the Lord always gave us a way.  We had told Him that it was important to us (and we knew that it was important to Him), so we had faith to go even if it meant tightening our belts in other areas.  He helped us find the time and the means to go every month.

Then near the beginning of the year (2013) Adam and I decided we wanted to teach English abroad.  We searched and searched for different programs and found the one that fit what we were looking for: in the republic of Georgia.

We started the application process and felt good about our decision.  We would be there for a full six months and would gain experience as well as have time to learn a new language.  There was only one problem: the nearest temple would be in Kiev, Ukraine - 27 hours away.

We thought about the reality of our potential teaching schedule and realized that we might have to put our goal on hold while in Georgia.  We hoped the Lord would forgive us.  But the Lord had other plans for us.

Several weeks later we were notified that Georgia had had a change in government and the English program had been discontinued.  We were devastated.  But it was really a blessing in disguise, and the Lord was about to show us that.

Adam and I looked for other programs for teaching abroad and one day we happened upon a cute little program in Machala, Ecuador.

The more we looked into the program, the better it sounded.  It was still six months, would get us the experience we needed, and help us better our already-slipping Spanish skills.  A little afraid, I looked up where the nearest temple was: just 3 hours away in Guayaquil, Ecuador.

I knew this was the Lord helping us keep our goal.  The temple was closer to us in Ecuador than it was in Virginia!  The Lord has continued to help us keep our goal and I know if we trust in Him, he will always help us with the goals we make.  Even more so if we make the goals with His help.

An Unlikely Friend (by Bethany)

I made a new friend recently. I talk to her at least once a day, often twice. She asks me about my family and my church and my weekend.  I ask her about how the schools here work (we recently moved in), community events, and the music she plays. She is always happy to see me. She loves my kids, is always interested in them, and helps me tend them as much as she can. I’m so lucky to have her as a friend.

Did I mention she’s in the fourth grade?

I met Megan the first day I took my first grader, Grace, to the bus stop. She immediately started talking to us, playing with the baby, and answering the many questions I had about the school. She’s a cute, chubby girl with African parents and the most adorable little kindergartener brother you’ve ever seen. Her mom gives her interesting new hairdos every week or two, often with extensions weaved in. It’s nice to have someone to ask all my questions about African hair to!

Megan is at the bus stop every morning when I walk up with my stroller and three kids. She leaves whoever she is visiting with, and comes to hang out with us. She talks and talks, but I don’t mind. She’s very entertaining, interesting, and sweet. She helps entertain baby Charlie, and keeps telling me I need to get him a tuxedo and a baby limo, since he’s gonna be famous! She likes to pull him out of his stroller and hold him, even though he’s huge. When Alice falls (or gets pushed!) down, Megan is right there trying to comfort her. She’s a good kid.

We have our share of “fights”, as any friends do. One day, Grace got off the bus, and we needed to rush home to get her to ballet on time, so we started walking fast. Eventually, Megan came huffing and puffing up behind me. “Hell-O! Didn’t you hear me calling you?! You could wait up!” She was pretty upset at the time, but like any good friend, she quickly forgave and all was well the next day.

She’s a really funny kid too. A lot of times, she likes to push Charlie’s stroller for me on the walk home. One day, she said, “So, it seems to me, you should start paying me for my services. I was thinking a dollar per block. So, I’ve probably been pushing the stroller for like 6 days now, so you owe me about eighteen dollars.” I told her she’s too expensive, and I was gonna hire her little brother. She was shocked! “Uh, okay, how about just a dollar for all of it? Just bring me a dollar tomorrow, okay?” I told her I could just push the stroller myself. “Maybe I should charge you for the privilege of pushing the stroller of the amazing Charlie!” I said. Ha!

The other day, Grace got off the bus in the afternoon, and I asked her how her day was. She said it was bad, and Megan chimed in and said Grace’s friend wouldn’t sit by her on the bus, but that Megan let Grace sit by her. I told Megan that was nice of her, and waited until we were all settled at home for Grace to tell me about it.

Holding Grace on my lap on the living room floor, she told me that the friend she usually sits by on the bus has started not wanting Grace to sit with her. She sits with random people she doesn’t even know rather than saving a spot for Grace. When Grace tried to sit by her, the girl told her no, and Grace tried to find out why. By then, the bus driver was yelling for Grace to find a seat so they could move on. Megan told Grace to come sit by her.

“Megan’s a nice girl, huh, Grace?” I said.

“Yeah. She let me lay my head in her lap while I cried.”

I couldn’t hold back the tears. I felt so sad for my sweet, little girl. At the same time, I felt so grateful for the compassion and kindness of Megan. She was there for Grace when I couldn’t be.

Megan may be just a kid I talk to at the bus stop, and she may only know me as “Grace’s mom”, but I will always consider her my friend.

Megan's the tall one behind my little blonde Grace.

"It's a Hard Knock Life!" (by Heather)

I don't know about you guys, but when we were growing up we had CHORES.  I don't remember what they were, but I remember DREADING Saturdays. That's when we were really expected to do our chores. We weren't exactly singing "It's a Hard Knock life" like the orphans in Annie, but I seriously did not want to get out of bed on Saturday because I knew it would be an entire morning (and usually some of the afternoon) full of chores. There was no rest for the weary until all your chores were done. I hated Saturday because of it.

Pretty sure this is Bethany on a Saturday morning

As an adult, stay-at-home mom, and recovering "Saturday chores" victim, I understand that chores are important (and I am a firm believer in them), but I try to limit my kids and my chores to as few as possible on Saturday. Now instead of dreading Saturdays, we dread every day...oh wait....

(Left to right: Ashley, Whitney, Haley, Derek)

But seriously, maybe it's not really limiting chores on Saturday but more that everyone is in a routine of doing them each day, so that when Saturday rolls around, it's not such a shock to our systems.

This picture is a shock to my system, what am I doing???
(Left to right: Whitney, Haley, Justin, Bethany, Ashley, Heather)

Now I realize that my kids/my family is pretty young and my husband and I are relatively inexperienced parents (considering our oldest is 6), so of course I'm not saying that what we do is perfect or would work for everyone or whatever. All I'm saying is, we have something that works for us and I am so grateful and excited about it! Of course probably the day after I post this the kids will stage a coup and we'll have to start all over again. But for the time being, this is what we do at our house....

My kids are pretty young: 6, 5, 2, and 18 months. Although they are small, most of them are capable of being a great help around the house. So I'm doing them a favor by helping them fulfill their potential, right? They can thank me when they're older...

But really, having some chores is so great for them for so many reasons: teaching work ethic, contributing to the family, feeling a sense of accomplishment, and above all - preventing them from saying "I'm bored!" When the kids are done with their chores, they feel like they've really helped - and they absolutely have. They're happy and I'm SO happy.

Luke is 6 and the oldest, so theoretically he's got the hardest jobs...

Luke is totally capable of making his own bed, brushing his teeth (yeah, that still needs to be on the work chart or it probably wouldn't happen), fixing his hair (...ish), taking 2 different baskets of dirty laundry downstairs, bringing up his own clean laundry and folding it and putting it away, emptying a rack of the dishwasher, doing his homework, putting his backpack away and his lunchbox in the correct spot for the next day, cleaning up the outside toys, filling the water purifying thing in the fridge, and cleaning the toy room every day. Does seeing this list make you think I am a lazy mom? If he's doing all that, what in the heck am I doing?...Bon bons....

Jensen (turned 5 last week - still accepting birthday gifts if you were wondering)

Jensen does a lot of the same types of things Luke does (thanks to how competitive they are) with some variance: he puts the dishwasher silverware away, takes out the trash and tidies the bench where we store the coloring/art supplies. You'll also notice on the chore charts that the top 7 or so are outlined in a highlighter and kind of grayed out (on all the charts). That means those chores have to be done before school or no money, though they'll still have to do the chore either way. Sarah was right in her post when she said I am the meanest mom!

Eliza (2)

Eliza is obviously a lot younger than the boys so her stuff is slightly easier: going on the potty (she thinks if you go at night, then you're good for another 24 hours - so yeah, it's on her chore chart so she does it in the morning), she does a different tray of silverware, puts all the shoes away at night, tidies the upstairs book supply, helps take out the trash, etc.   - Now you are sure I am a lazy mom! I make my 2 year old work? Yeah, MEAN.

They each get 2 cents a job. If I could afford more then I would pay more, but 2 cents is what my budget allows and the job market isn't very good around here so they're just glad to have a job ;)

And seriously, they don't know the difference. I pay them on Saturday after they've finished their chores for the day, and they get about $1.44 in quarters, dimes, nickels, and pennies and they think they are totally rich! And for a 6, 5 and 2 year old - they are!

Every month or so they buy a $5 toy which rejuvenates them so that they are begging for more chores. It's a win-win! If we're singing "It's a Hard Knock Life," we're having a good time doing it!

(Ashley, Bethany, Haley)

 (Haley, Whitney)

 So what are your secrets for getting your kids to do chores? I need to find something that will work for my lazy 18 month old ;)

Pepperoni Rolls (by Sarah)

All of us Flake sisters spent some of our growing up years in West Virginia.  West Virginia is famous for beautiful forests, Mountaineer football, and ... Pepperoni Rolls!

Pepperoni Rolls are exactly what they sound like.  They are a local food, like fry sauce in Utah.  In West Virginia, you can buy pepperoni rolls at the gas station, the Walmart bakery, local restaurants, even your high school cafeteria.  It's crazy, if you cross state lines, they just disappear!

They come in many shapes and sizes, just about any shape or size regular rolls come in.

Here is my personal recipe for pepperoni rolls.  Careful, it's very complicated---NOT!

Here's what you'll need:  Rhodes rolls, shredded mozzarella, and pepperoni

First, put the frozen rolls on a greased cookie sheet to thaw and rise.  Cover with a clean dish towel or plastic wrap.

I usually wait until they've risen enough to touch each other.

Take one roll at a time and smash it into an oblong oval shape, like this.

Lay a few pieces of pepperoni down.  (My magic number is 5,but you may like more or less)

Throw a little mozzarella on there.

Roll one side over and keep rolling until it makes a tube like this:

Once all of your rolls are made up, it's time to let them rise again!

Again, I wait until they touch each other.  Then I bake them at 350 degrees until golden brown.

Although they are delicious warm, I recommend letting them cool completely.  Don't cover them in plastic, as that will make them soggy.  I cover them with a dish towel.  Also, don't stack them until they are completely cool.

Pepperoni rolls are perfect for road trips, sack lunches, tailgate parties, or just a regular meal.

You'd better make a lot.  The kids will love them!

Creating Magic (by Ashley)

Christmas. The mere word brings a smile to some peoples' faces. Magic ignites the season, and brings a special glow to every Christmas memory. I have given a lot of thought to what makes Christmas magical, and it has led me on a journey to the importance of magic, that "special feeling" that can make days seem brighter and afternoons happier.

What is magic? I define it this way: an escape. Another world. Something unexplained that excites you. We adults are looking for "magic" all the time. We read novels. We watch movies. Young children create their own magic. In their pretend play in the kitchen. In the belief of things that aren't "real." This is a true yearning we have that never goes away.

What is the benefit of magic? For young children, creating and participating in magic has a great effect. In my eyes it's so much more than an "outlet for creativity" or a "brain stretching exercise." They realize that they have the potential to create their own magic. They feel motivated and inspired. The possibilities are endless. There is a fire that comes with magic that cannot be duplicated.

I feel that magic when I think about raising my children. The ideas that swirl around, the different traditions and teaching tools I want to try seem endless. I see magic when I see our future. Building a farm house, creating a beautiful life, there are nothing but roses blooming in that picture.

But I have found, in my adult life, it does no good to compartmentalize magic. If the magic only happens when you "have time" to read a book, or when you are "free" from responsibilities on weekends, then about 90% of your life is lived without fire. You are forever looking forward to "dreamy" times and calling the rest drudgery.

How much we can learn from the simple ways of a child! Magic is everywhere. It explains how the dishes get clean, or why their skirt twirls in the wind, or what makes the clock chime on the hour (it's fairies, I tell you).

They don't need to escape anywhere because their world is magical.

When I am around my young children, it's easy to get caught up in their magic and it infects me. I start to notice how big and tall that tree is, as big as a house, or that the leaf really does look like a star. This is why people love being around little kids on Christmas morning.

When I don't allow myself to be a part of their magic, I realize it starts by being grateful. I begin to notice how the breeze makes everything smell like Earth, or how that cashier smiled at me for no good reason. Then I don't need to watch that movie to be tucked away into a beautiful kingdom, I see it all around me.

When magic permeates your life, there's no "living for the weekend" or "trying to find something fun to do" because you live it, daily. God gives us a beautiful, magical place to live in, each and every day.